A. L. Kaplan

Author: A. L. Kaplan

  • THE DONKEY CURSE

    Incessant braying rouses me from slumber. Hot smelly breath wafts over my face. Waving at the offending odor earns another head splitting shriek. I pry open my eyes and stare at a pair of mournful brown globes on a long gray furry face. Nonsensical images flash through my mind as my head smacks the roof of the pickup. Another plaintive bray sends goose bumps up my spine…a very naked spine. Memories of last night escape me.

    An old gypsy shoves the donkey away. Her bony fingers clench the edge of the car. The look in her eyes makes me shiver. Even the jingle of the silver bangles, that hang from her ears and arms, makes my skin crawl. I break from her gaze and watch a bronze medallion sway across her chest.

    “You soulless wretch. You’ll pay for what you did.”

    “I didn’t do anything.” At least that’s what I try to say. The words come out garbled.

    The crone laughs and steps back. I jump from the car and run. Within three steps I trip over my own legs…all four of them. Head spinning, I lay on the sandy ground. I’m a donkey, a god damn donkey.

    “You treated my granddaughter poorly last night. I gave you a body to fit your actions. You’ll need to earn your way back to human form.”

    A coarse rope pulls me to my feet and down the road to a raven haired woman. Bruises model one side of her face and nail gouges mar both arms. Memories return. I did that. I back away and pray for escape, for another glass of whiskey. All I find is the crack of a whip.

  • That Which Awaits

    The first animal seen after your first battle is your totem spirit. At least that’s what I’ve been told all my life. Now my friends all boast of the animals they saw and the good omens they portend. My experience was different. I should be joyful. My totem is the bearer of magic, wisdom, and messages from beyond. Yet happiness eludes me.

    Juices run down my hand from the fresh roasted meat I hold, but it feels dry in my mouth. It’s not the cool night air that sends shivers down my back, it’s the vision I saw as the fighting ended, right after I saw my totem. I edge closer to the fire, hoping its warmth will drive away my chills.

    I don’t fear death. Never have. Never will. Perhaps that’s why this totem chose me. With my free hand I clutch the pouch that hangs from my neck and close my eyes. Images from the battle replay in my mind, each detail, clearer by the second. The end never changes.

    A loud caw caw and the flutter of wings. A lone black feather swirls to my feet. I watch the raven as it circles three times then flies east. Wind tugs at my hair.  Sand and dirt blind me, yet my sight is true. I look down. The raven feather still rests at my feet.

    It’s a new beginning for me, a vision of the future….but none of my friends or family are in it.

  • I Remember Mama

    Kara gripped Ethan’s hand and grimaced. The contraction felt like a knife twisting in her lower back. Pain radiated down her legs. Had Mama felt this much pain when she was born? More than anything, Kara wished she could ask, but Mama died in the upheavals many years ago. All Kara had left were distant memories of loving warmth as Mama’s arms wrapped around her. A simple hug and kiss was all it took to cure a scraped knee or drive away bad dreams.

    Another contraction snapped her to the present. That old life was gone. Ethan wiped the sweat from her brow and whispered words of encouragement. Her adoptive wolf mama didn’t labor like this when she gave birth. Was something wrong? Outside the cave she heard the pack pace. The three young wolves had come with her when she and Ethan joined. What a strange family she had now with three wolf siblings and a human mate. Both Mama Wolf and Mama would have liked Ethan. They had both passed on, yet Kara could feel them watching over her labors.

    Pressure built with the next contraction. Invisible hands rested on her shoulders. A warm tongue seemed to caress her cheek. It was time. Kara bit her lip as she bore down. Silence filled the cave.  Fear made her heart clench. Then a cry reached her ears, strong and hearty. Ethan grinned as he placed the newest member of their pack on her chest. Now she was the Mama.

  • The Adventures of the Cute Assistant

    Damnit, Mom, aim that thing somewhere else, like where I’m pointing. How many shots have you already missed because you’re too obsessed with photographing me? Yeah, I know I’m cute and fluffy, but you have a job to do. Dog shots just don’t bring in the big bucks.

    Click, click, click.

    Darn camera makes so much noise. No wonder Sasquatch ran away. And don’t get me started on Nessie. She stared at you for five whole minutes before she swam away. At least turn the sound off. It’s digital for goodness sakes.

    Click, click, click.

    Look over there, just above the tree line. What is that monstrous thing?

    Click, click, click.

    Quick, quick! Before it’s too late.

    Click, click, click.

    This time you’re not going to just lose the shot. You could lose your head. Turn around before that thing eats you. It’s closing in.

    Click, click, click.

    Good god, it’s diving right at you!

    Click, click, click.

    It’s on the ground now. You have to move. Run away.

    Click, click, click.

    Can’t you hear it? Can’t you smell its reek?

    Click, click, click.

    Close. So dangerously close.

    Click, click, click.

    I can’t stand it anymore. I have to do something. Be gone you demon!

    “Marge! Your damned dog is attacking my hand glider again. Please say you got the shot this time.”

  • SUPPOSE

    SupposeSuppose you saw something you couldn’t explain. And then suppose it turned out to be something far stranger, or funnier, or more horrifying than you ever expected. That element of surprise, and a different way of looking at things, is what this anthology is all about. Most of the short stories take less than fifteen minutes to read, and the ultra-short drabbles take less than thirty seconds.

     Kathy Steinemann, Amber Hayward, A. L. Kaplan, and Donna Milward, share their tales and fantasies in this book of drabbles, flash fiction, and short stories. The foreword is provided by Barbara Galler-Smith.

    Why would the government force an artist to paint portraits of despots or drug lords? Why would healthy people die for no obvious reason? Do you suppose that wishes could ever be dangerous? What’s a BioInterFace Fluxxatron? Do aliens watch reality shows? Why would someone pay double the usual rate to move a heavy trunk? Why is the mud from Sludge Flats so valuable?

    Discover the answers to these questions in this collection.

    “Suppose” is available at several online retailers.

    Story Cartel

    Amazon 

  • Incoherence 101

    1.  Skip breakfast for routine blood work.

    2.  Pick up coffee and a healthy muffin at the baker.

    3.  Add six packages of sugar to the coffee.

    4.  Make a pot of coffee when you get home.

    5.  Mega load coffee with brown sugar.

    6.  Eat lunch at two when your visiting college student wakes.

    7.  Spend the remainder of the day trying to keep up with and remember all the thoughts zipping through your caffeine and sugar addled mind.

    8.  Crash, exhausted by nine o’clock PM.

    9.  Wake thirty seconds later to write Incoherence 101.

  • Geronimo

    Five, four, three, two, one…

    Wind rips at my face as I dive off the balloon. Adrenaline surges through my veins. Free fall, the ultimate thrill. Then the rope jerks up. I whoop as my body springs up toward the teetering balloon, then down again. Each bounce of the bungee decreases in stride until I sway upside down a thousand feet above the ground. Blood rushes to my head. Life as an accountant is boring. This is anything but. I continue to hoot as they pull me back into the swinging basket.

    “You idiot!” The balloon pilot’s face is almost purple and his eyes bulge. “Are you insane? You almost tipped the basket.”

    Three other sets of eyes glare at me. The looks alone make me burst out laughing again. None of them knew of the stunt until my leap to freedom. A young couple huddle together, ashen faced. Their hands clench the tethers holding them in the basket. The third is my date of the week.

    “Hey, Marlene, wasn’t that a blast?”

    Marlene walks the three steps across the basket and slugs me so hard I almost fall out of the basket. Maybe it would have been better if I had. She follows it up with a sharp kick that sends daggers of pain from my groin to my fingertips. That destroys the euphoria.

    “Kill yourself on your own time, Janus.”

    A second later she me hogties me. The fun wears off when they land and leave me tied up in the basket. Last time I date a rodeo champ.

  • MIDNIGHT WOLF

    “Leave him be, Billy.”

    “Dumb wolf cur always stares at us.”

    “It’s just his way.”

    Billy hurls another rock, but I knock it down with my book. Not a sound comes from the fenced in junkyard, but I know from the look on Billy’s face that Midnight is showing off his pearly whites.

    “Fine,” he yells, then disappears around the corner.

    Midnight’s golden eyes meet me when I turn. “Sorry, Midnight. See you tomorrow.”

    Silence greets me, as it has every day for the past five years. I smile anyway, then hurry to catch up with Billy.

    A hand slaps over my mouth and I’m dragged into a dark alley. I crash into a wall. My head spins. Three masked figures loom over me. Hands dig into my pockets, yank off my sneakers. A fist slams into my gut. My heart pounds as a knife flicks into view, arm ready to strike. Billy’s body lies nearby. I clamped my eyes shut, and wait for death.

    Screams fill my ears, but they aren’t mine. When I finally open my eyes, my attackers lie in a pool of dark liquid. A pair of glowing gold eyes stare at me from across the alley. Then they vanish.

    ***

    The police never found Midnight and the junk man claimed he never had a dog. I don’t walk that way anymore, but sometimes, out of the corner of my eye, I see Midnight in the shadows, watching out for me.

  • Restaurant Review: Chutney – Warm Inviting Atmosphere – Good Indian Food

    Looking for some good Indian food? Look no further than Chutney, a new Indian restaurant in Columbia MD. Located at 9400 Snowden River Parkway, the golden yellow walls, decorated with framed posters, reminded me of a warm sunny day. Their attentive and welcoming staff made me and my family feel at home.

    We started our meal with Sev Poori Chaat. This crunchy dish made of puffed rice, and vermicelli was cool and refreshing, a perfect way to start a meal. Next up was a light and crispy vegetable samosa with just the right blend of seasoning. The ratio of potatoes to green peas was spot on, and it was probably one of the best samosas I’ve had in a while.

    For dinner we ordered Daal Tadka, yellow lentils cooked with ginger, garlic and cumin seeds. While tasty and perfectly spiced for my daughter and husband, it was a little too spicy for my palette. Our waiter noticed me suddenly guzzle water and offered to have the chef prepare a second, less spicy version which was just right. He also brought out a taste of Chana Masala, a chick pea dish cooked with their house blend of spices. It was delicious.

    Our favorite of the evening, however, was the Goat Curry. Tender chunks of goat were simmered in a tomato based, piquant gravy.  It had a fresh flavor with a slight kick that went well with the seasoned rice.

    We managed to save enough room for Kheer, a rice dessert prepared with nuts and saffron. This creamy creation is a perfect way to end a meal.

    Chutney
    9400 Snowden River Pkwy
    Columbia, MD 21045
    Phone: 410-381-3600
    www.chutneymd.com
     
    Hours of Operations
    Mon – Thu:     11:30 AM – 2.30 PM (Lunch)
                              5 PM – 10 PM (Dinner)
    Fri – Sun:        12 M – 3:00 PM (Lunch)
                             5 PM – 11 PM (Dinner)

  • Indies Unlimited Flash Fiction Star

     

    Congratulations to A. L. Kaplan, whose entry “Blood and Ice” won this week’s Indies Unlimited Flash Fiction Challenge.

    The voter-selected story was recognized with a special feature at Indiesunlimited.com and wins a place in there 2014 Flash Fiction Anthology, which will be published as an e-book when this year’s challenges are completed.